daily quota: Croft

"Anybody nobody wanted -- that’s who my father wanted to help... My dad was the type of person who never walked by a homeless person who someone else wouldn’t even notice. He would stop and find out why they were so distraught and find a solution to help take their pain away."
- Robin Croft, 'Kent County Times'

quipping post: Little Ambition for Anything Else

A drunk seemed to have just enough energy to go to work every day and get drunk every night, but had little ambition for anything else. When their neighbors were moving, his wife insisted he help them. Reluctanly, he approached his manager at work for a day off, "It will be a lot of hard work but they really need my help." The manager shot back, "It's out of the question! We're swamped right now so there's no way I can spare you for a day!" "Thanks boss," the drunk replied, "I owe you one."

daily quota: Lusher

"Phil Kitchen, an unemployed alcoholic, won £1.8 million in 1999 and was found dead in his £500,000 home two years later, surrounded by two crates of lager and an unopened bottle of whisky. His clothes were filthy. He hadn't left his sofa in months."
- Adam Lusher, from 'Don't Live a Lotto... Live a Little'

quipping post: Unlimited

"Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows."
- Jennifer Unlimited

quick link: Online Meetings

AA Online "produces open 'facsimile' AA real time topic meetings for Alcoholics on the Web. It has 26 online Alcoholics Anonymous meetings per week on the WWW and plans to add more. Approximately 15 to 40 people flow through the room during any one meeting. Average attendance per meeting is between 15 and 19. All recovering alcoholics, or anyone with a desire to stop drinking with a Java Enabled Browser can attend the WWW Meetings." See their home page here:
AA Online

daily quota: Key

"Self-honesty is hard for us, but it is absolutely necessary for any kind of victorious living. Alcoholics Anonymous has so much to teach us. A person can be dry for 20 years, yet he/she will always begin a testimony with, I am (not was), an alcoholic."
- Jack Key, 'Courier Herald'

quipping post: Wife Has a Real Problem

A drunk spent his whole weekend at the bar and was back again on Monday. The bartender asked, "You've been spending a lot of time here lately, everything alright at home?" The drunk confided, "Just between us, my wife has a real problem and I can't look at at her when she's like that! It's the shrugs, and then those horrible shakes!" The bartender was confused, "You mean drugs, don't you? She does drugs and then gets the shakes, is that it?" The drunk explained, "Don't be ridiculous, my wife doesn't do drugs! It's like I said: everytime I come home from the bar she just shrugs and then starts shaking her head."

today: It's Show Time! Cocktails at 5 with Jeffrey Debuts Today, Monday, June 28 on wsradio.com

Broadcasting live every Monday except Holidays starting today! Cocktails at 5 helps people understand how to recover from alcoholism and other addictive behaviors. The show has been designed to enhance standard recovery methods such as AA, rehab centers and self-help books. Listeners are encouraged to call (888) 327-0061 to share their stories on the air. Spend an hour on yourself and tune in live online, from 5-6 pm Pacific; 6-7 pm Mountain; 7-8 pm Midwest; 8-9 pm East Coast Time
More info: Alcohol 411 Show site: Cocktails at 5

new links added: Recovery Site; Doctors in AA; Recovery Music

A true gem! This delightful site offers lots of resources. Also, hover your mouse over the blue 'Menu' bar on the left side of the main page and a list of categories pops out for you to click into:
An AA Recovery Site

International Doctors in Alcoholics Anonymous is a fellowship of doctors and their families whose primary purpose is to support one another in recovery from alcoholism and other drug addictions:
Doctors in AA

'If you, or someone you love, suffer from eating disorders, anorexia or bulimia, child abuse, spousal abuse, depression or addiction issues, this music is just for you!' Check out the MP3 song clips:
Geri's Recovery Music

daily quota: Bradley

"I've never met a person, I don't care what his condition, in whom I could not see possibilities. I don't care how much a man may consider himself a failure, I believe in him, for he can change the thing that is wrong in his life at any time he is ready and prepared to do it. Whenever he develops the desire, he can take away from his life the thing that is defeating it. The capacity for reformation and change lies within."
-Preston Bradley

quipping post: Moment of Clarity?

A fellow phoned his sponsor with some news, "I think I had one of those, what do you call it, a moment of clarity? Remember the last time we talked I was so angry with you?" The sponsor was polite about it, "I seem to remember something like that." The sponsee continued, "Well, I understand now why I was so mad... I mean, I thought about how you've been with me through all of my rough times. Like when my girlfriend split, and then you stuck by me when I lost my job, and you were even there through the times when I felt like taking a drink. Remembering all of that made me realize something: I need a different sponsor -- it's obvious you bring me bad luck."

new links added: Treatment Locator, UK & Eire Al-Anon, Indonesian Treatment Center, Native American Health

If you or a loved one is still suffering from alcoholism or drug abuse, there is help! This on-line resource will help in locating drug and alcohol abuse treatment programs. For additional advice, you may call one of the Referral Helplines. These are Toll free, so you have nothing to lose by calling 1-800-662-HELP; 1-800-662-9832 (Español) 1-800-228-0427 (TDD):
SAMHSA Treatment Locator

UK & Eire Al-Anon Family Groups for families and friends of alcoholics. Al-Anon Family Groups provide understanding, strength and hope to anyone whose life is, or has been, affected by someone else’s drinking:
Al-Anon UK & Eire

Joyce & David G who maintain the recovery site Graffiti run this Recovery Treatment Center in Indonesia:
Non-English Bahasa Indonesia

An information portal to issues affecting the health and well-being of American Indians. Includes links to several health topics as well as traditional healing resources and environmental health:
Native American Health

daily quota: Grady

"After many years of living with an alcoholic, three children, and many trials and tribulations, I found help in a program called Alanon, and my husband found Alcoholics Anonymous. We found through the programs we were all sick as a result of alcoholism. I truly believe I was the sickest in the bunch. I was so busy trying to keep my alcoholic husband sober, until I thought I had no faults... I have been in Alanon for many years and I truly feel Alanon was a gift from God to prepare me for things yet to come in my life. Through the loss of a child, due to drinking, I thought it would kill me... Later my husband died due to emphysema. There again I had God, people and family around me. I found the strength to go on. I'm not perfect, I'm human, but today I am the best person I can be, due to the Alanon program and all it has given me."
- Sue Grady, 'The Kinston Free Press'

quipping post: Starr

"Of course I'm ambitious. What's wrong with that?
Otherwise you sleep all day."
- Ringo Starr

new links: Graffiti from Indonesia, Teens Check Yourself, Family Guide, Mental Health Info

This site is "brought to you with love from Indonesia." As you'll see, the love part really shows! You don't want to rush through it: there's a beautiful intro you can read as you scroll down to the eight 'doors' of Graffiti poetry. Clicking on the 'Links of Friends' provides info about AA metings and contacts in Indonesia, Recovery Materials, and there's even some nice music as you tour the pages. If you feel good when you visit, you'll feel even better when you leave:
Graffiti from Indonesia

A place for teens to check where they are with drugs and alcohol. Also gives teens a voice by allowing them to share their own 'moments of truth' stories, visitors get factual answers to questions about substance abuse, learn how to talk about their concerns with people who can help them, and get information about counseling and treatment facilities:
Teens Check Yourself

A Family Guide To Keeping Youth Mentally Healthy & Drug Free is a public education Web site devoloped by SAMHSA (Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration). It communicates to parents and other caring adults about how they can help promote their child’s mental health and reduce his or her risk for becoming involved with alcohol, tobacco, and illegal drugs:
SAMHSA Family Guide

The SAMHSA National Mental Health Information Center provides information about mental health via a toll-free telephone number in the U.S. (800-789-2647) and this web site:
SAMHSA Mental Health Info

daily quota: Whitehead

"You can foster or foil any genetic tendencies... the experience of people is that it can be very hard to change some trait, for instance, alcoholism, therefore it is tempting to say it is innate. But most traits are the result of reinforcement in our minds, and perhaps bodies, hundreds or thousands of times over many years and it is no wonder that a similar prolonged intense effort would be required to change them. Alcoholics can testify to that."
- Neil Whitehead, 'New Zealand Herald'

quipping post: What's Wrong with Me?

A fellow met his sponsor for coffee after not seeing him for some time. The sponsor asked, "So, what have you been up to?" The sponsee filled him in, "Not much, really. But I don't know what my problem is. I keep putting things off all the time -- I need to do my laundry, I didn't even shave this morning... Maybe it's just the way I am! But I look in the mirror these days and I see a real slob, what's wrong with me?" His sponsor looked him over and replied: "Well, for starters, there's obviously nothing wrong with your eyesight."

new links: NAIGSO-AA, AA History and Bibliography

The Native American Indian General Service Office of Alcoholics Anonymous (NAIGSO-AA) functions to provide a vision of recovery, unity and service to the more than 500 sovereign Indian Nations in North America, which are recognized by the Federal Government:
Native American NAIGSO-AA

An Illustrated Alcoholic Anonymous Bibliography, History and Recovery Pages. Scroll this site for lots of interesting resources and also check the left-hand column where you'll discover even more worth clicking into:
AA History and Bibliography

daily quota: James

"The world we see that seems so insane is the result of a belief system that is not working. To perceive the world differently, we must be willing to change our belief system, let the past slip away, expand our sense of now, and dissolve the fear in our minds."
- William James

quipping post: Concerned About His Dog

A drunk was concerned about his dog's behavior lately. All of his money was tied up in drinking, but luckily an old friend of his was a veterinarian and often looked at the pooch for free. After a quick examination, the vet invited the man to have a seat. "Your dog will be fine, she's just expecting a litter of puppies. So that's good news! But we've been friends for a long time and I'm concerned about you. Each time you visit it's obvious you've been drinking. I can smell it from here! We know your dog has been acting differently because she's going to have puppies, but do you have a good explanation for your behavior?" The man just shook his head and replied: "You're asking too much of me! I drink every day and I don't understand it, so how could I possibly explain it to a bunch of little puppies?"

new link: Neil Slade's Brain Info

"In this day and age, when 6-year-old kids are learning to use complex computers - nearly all of us have failed to properly learn about the most complex machine in the universe - our own brain." Beyond providing lots of brain info, Neil Slade shows you how to super-activate specific parts of your brain: the amygdala and frontal lobes. It's all based on scientific research, largely about what different areas of the brain actually do - no parlour tricks here! The amygdala is a small almond-shaped part of the brain, two in each brain, located about one inch inside each temple. Think of the amygdalas as switches in your brain that can direct energy flow toward the frontal lobes that process the positive functions of cooperation, creativity, esp (or intuition, if you prefer) and help reduce anxiety, stress and so on. The methods can be as simple as "imaging" a feather tickling the amygdala, which automatically shunts neurochemical activity forward into the previously "dormant" frontal lobes (this technique is described below, following the news stories if you want to give it a try). It's obvious Neil likes to have fun, and is very open about sharing the experiences that shape his personal brain adventures:
Neil Slade's Brain Info

new link continued: Click Your Amygdalas Forward!

Here's a brief description of the "imaging" feather technique mentioned above. If you have the time, reading this four-page article would give you some helpful background: View Zone article. It really doesn't do it justice without more info, but to go ahead and give it a try:

- First, remember your amygdalas are located about one inch in from each temple (if pictures help, see this: Amygdala Chart).

- Relax by saying a prayer or whatever quiets your mind, and make sure you're comfortable.

- Here's what you'll be doing next: Imagine you're holding a feather. Without actually moving your hand, "image" taking the feather and lightly tickle the front part of one amygdala forward... then move to the front part of the other amygdala and tickle forward, sending energy toward your frontal lobes.

- Now, close your eyes to help you feel any subtle effects, and give it a try...

It's that easy to get started, and you can do it anywhere anytime! You could have felt anything from a calming warm feeling in your frontal lobes, to an energetic oomph! If you felt something, great, if not try again later or better still, do some reading on Neil's site. The real benefits are cumulative: "the more frequently you tickle, the more you click, the more pronounced the results."

Speaking from personal experience, these tools really work! Along with prayer, AA, and good friends, Neil's resources have helped me in my recovery. Check out Amazing Brain Info, Books & Music for yourself. There's lots there to discover including a newsletter, and if some of the articles about more 'paranormal' topics aren't your thing, then take what you like and leave the rest... but get clicking!
Neil Slade's Brain Info

daily quota: Rhyant

"I know the cycle, because I had a $2,000-a-week cocaine habit that started with beer, then Jack Daniels and later cocaine... I came apart in 1990 and lost just about everything... I was rebellious and dropped out of college... I wanted to be my own God... When I see success, it just lights me up... It's part of recovery... You keep failing till you succeed."
- Jerome Rhyant, 'Palm Beach Post'

new links: Deaf and Hard of Hearing, Area 78, Edmonton AA Central Office

Deaf and Hard of Hearing AA 12 Steps Recovery Resources:
Deaf and Hard of Hearing

Area 78 AA - Alberta and Northwest Territories, Canada:
Regional Area 78 AA

AA Central Office in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada:
Regional Edmonton AA

new online recovery broadcast: Cocktails at 5 with Jeffrey Debuts Monday, June 28 on wsradio.com

The following is from an eMediaWire PR Web press release:
"Cocktails at 5 (Broadcast live from 5:00-6:00 p.m. PST every Monday except Holidays) helps people understand how to recover from alcoholism and other addictive behaviors. The show has been designed to enhance standard recovery methods such as AA, rehab centers and self-help books." Jeffrey continues, "As a recovering alcoholic, I share my own story, interview experts in the field and respond to questions live on the air. To learn more about the show or listen to a live performance click on the link below. Listeners are encouraged to call (888) 327-0061 to share their stories on the air."
Cocktails at 5

daddy-o's day: Wishing all of you dads out there a sober and happy Father's Day Sunday ...this blog's for you!

new link: National Treatment Referral

This U.S. service will help you find treatment for your own or a loved one's alcohol abuse problems. The site provides answers to the following questions: What are the causes of alcoholism? What are some of the alcoholism signs? What are the effects of alcoholism? What are alcoholism symptoms? What is teen alcoholism? What is Alcoholics Anonymous? Also offers a toll-free phone number to call, so you have nothing to lose by seeing how they can help: 1-800-375-4577
National Treatment Referral

daily quota: Frank, Twain

"How true Daddy's words were when he said: All children must look after their own upbringing. Parents can only give good advice or put them on the right paths, but the final forming of a person's character lies in their own hands."
- Anne Frank

"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years."
- Mark Twain

quipping post: Father's Day Outing

A mother and daughter were taking dad out for Father's day. While they were waiting for mom to get ready, dad took the opportunity to have a chat with his daughter. "I know I've been drinking too much and mom's always complaining. But it was my choice not to drink today -- I still wear the pants in this family..." He was interrupted when mom came into the room, took one look at her husband and said: "Oh good, you listened to me and didn't take a drink -- and I'm glad you're going with those pants I told you to wear."

daily quota: Crane, Cavett

"All right, let's review. Last night, I got knee-walking drunk and now I am back at this bar a mere seven and a half hours later, hung over! Well, it's official -- I have a problem."
- Frasier Crane in TV series 'Cheers'

"There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?"
- Dick Cavett

quipping post: Racing Shellfish

Did you hear about the maritime drunk who earned his drinking money by racing shellfish? His prize crab could run so fast it would break into a scallop.

daily quota: Leger, Handey

"I went to the altar hooked on crack, shooting crystal meth, an alcoholic, drug abuser for many years and God completely set me free that day. And from that day forward, it has been amazing to see what God is able to do in the life of someone who says, 'Lord, I've done enough -- I have enough. It's time for you to take over.' And when God takes over then everything works for a purpose and for a plan. Because God has a plan for everyone. We just have to put Him first in our plan."
- Rev Bobby Leger, 'KPLC TV'

"Once my friend told me that he had found Jesus. I thought to myself, 'Woohoo, we're rich!' It turns out he meant something different."
- Jack Handey

quipping post: Joining a Church

A drunk's wife told him repeatedly that his drinking would kill him. Wanting to prove her wrong, he remembered hearing about the power of group prayer and considered joining a church. Having no religious background, he asked a preacher how the services worked. "Show up Sunday! There will be prayers, a short homily, then communion; at our church we use bread and non-alcohol grape juice." It didn't seem too bad so far, "How much does it cost?" The preacher explained, "We're not out to make a profit so members only give what they can." The drunk thought about it, "No problem, padre: how about instead of the same old bread and grape juice, I bring pizza and beer for everyone?"

new link: Sweet Sobriety

This new recovery site is still under construction and should be in full swing by the end of June. You can see April's warm QuickTime intro where she says, "We started this web page for people who have a desire to stay sober." Sounds good to me! And they're looking for people to share their stories with others, in a number of formats. Check it out!
Sweet Sobriety

daily quota: Phernetton, Ancis

"My many different experiences, such as my personal battle with addiction and alcoholism has given me my compassion for others. With my personal pains within the addiction, from lying to stealing, from driving drunk to attempting suicide, I can honestly look in the faces of others today and know I have experienced my hell... My life lived, has given me my ability to oversee judgments, to let them go for the most part, and see the light in every single person, no matter what."
- Tracy Phernetton, 'The Truth Within the Process'

"The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well."
- Joe Ancis

quipping post: Dilemma

A woman had been dating two men on a regular basis. Because she was drinking too much, she developed a horrible habit of procrastinating and never got around to choosing which of the two she liked more. Then within a matter of days, each asked if she would consider marriage. Now she could no longer drown her dilemma with booze and had to make a decision. She mulled over their differences. One was a dairy farmer and the other a poet: should she marry for butter or verse?

daily quota: Guggenbühl, Bowen

"Bottles are everywhere in the drawings. And if you ask them what they wish for, their prime wish is to get rid of the bottles... These children see their parent as having a demon inside..."
- Allan Guggenbühl, 'Nzz Online'

"Children are God's spies."
- Elizabeth Bowen

quipping post: He Never Forgets at Home

A drunk was taking a holiday with his wife and daughter. It was already time to board the plane when the drunk insisted he needed the men's room and couldn't wait. His wife scolded him, "You and your bladder! I reminded you to take care of that before we left the house -- at home you're always running to the bathroom, but whenever we're out you forget!" Much to the drunk's dismay, their daughter had an explanation: "Didn't you know, mom? Dad doesn't forget at home because that's where he hides his booze."

new link: Alano Clubs

Curious about other recovery clubs out there and what they're doing? Do you like roundups and sober events? Here's a good world-wide directory with a newsletter available:
Alano Clubs

And don't forget to stop by a cyber place set up with the feel and flavor of genuine recovery clubs, complete with online AA meetings and fellowship, games arcade, events calendar and lots of other resources:
Alano Club Online

DAILY QUOTA: Ray Charles: 1930 - 2004

"You gets a little drunk and you lands in jail."
- Ray Charles, 'Ol Man River'

"My mother told me
'Fore she passed away,
Said son when I'm gone
Don't forget to pray;
'Cause there'll be hard times,
Who knows better than I?
Well I soon found out
Just what she meant,
When I had to pawn my clothes
Just to pay the rent...
Lord, one of these days,
There'll be no more sorrow
When I pass away;
And no more hard times,
Who knows better than I?"
- Ray Charles, 'Hard Times'

QUIPPING POST: She says he's lazy

A fellow was complaining to his sponsor, "My wife is driving me nuts! She says that since I'm sober now, I should show some initiative and find a job, that I'm just lazy, otherwise I would get my driver's license back so that I could drive to meetings. But I don't see that as a problem -- we only live five minutes from the meeing place!" His sponsor listened patiently and asked, "So, you don't think you're lazy?" The sponsee replied, "Abslolutely not! It takes a lot of hard work to convince her to give me cab fare each time."

NEW LINK: Recovery is Good for You

'Devoted to those who have, and those who wish to recover from seemingly hopeless conditions of mind, body and spirit':
Recovery Is Good For You

DAILY QUOTA: Thompson, Rohn

"For the sake of Mary I kicked the reds,
Junked the juice, drink coffee instead;
Straightened my teeth, bent my back,
Cut my friends dead from the old rat pack."
- Richard Thompson

"If you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into someone else's plan. And guess what they may have planned for you? Not much."
- Jim Rohn

QUIPPING POST: Newly Issued Alcohol Warnings

Perils of drinking alcohol: Warning Labels

DAILY QUOTA: Desdamona, West

"You don’t have to be that alcoholic kid sitting on the corner to be accepted."
- Desdamona, 'Pulse of the Twin Cities'

"I found out, through it all ... that I'm an OK individual; I do have a lot to offer. And I don't need outside approval for that to be so."
- Bob West, 'San Diego Union Tribune'

QUIPPING POST: Another Elephant

Q: What do you get when you genetically splice a drunk with an elephant?
A: A drunk who never forgets where he hid the booze.

NEW LINK: Sponsor to Sponsor

An extremely unique 12 Step recovery site with information, personal stories, recovery humor, poetry, devotions and a fantastic recovery newsletter. You will enjoy the graphics and all the free recovery posters and web designs for your recovery web site. A must see!
Sponsor to Sponsor

DAILY QUOTA: King, Levant

"No regrets; sobering up undoubtedly saved my life... The sun is shining, the day is beautiful, and what I'm going to do is take a walk."
- Stephen King, 'USA Today'

"I have given up reading books; I find it takes my mind off myself."
- Oscar Levant

QUIPPING POST: Might be?

You Might Be an Alcoholic If... Buddy T's Top 20 List

DAILY QUOTA: Fuller, Grosscup

"Life is just a series of trying to make up your mind."
- Timothy Fuller

"I didn't actually get to the skid row, but I could have easily been homeless if I had drank a few more years... I reached the point where I was going to change or I was going to die."
- Lee Grosscup, 'Newark Star Ledger'

QUIPPING POST: Miscalculated

A drunk was behind in his drinking. It seems he miscalculated when picking up his supply on Friday, so by Sunday the cupboard was bare. Running across the street to the liquor store for some more hootch, he wasn't careful and got hit by a bus. He lay in the hospital unconscious for almost 24 hours until he awoke Monday in the hospital. He realized it was the first time he could remember going a whole day without a drink. The doctor told him he suffered a severe concussion, two fractured ribs and a broken arm. When asked how he was feeling, the drunk replied: "Honestly, not as bad as I do most Monday mornings -- there must be something to to the idea of not drinking every day."

NEW LINK: Cocktails at 5

Added to dryblog links today:
A new recovery talk show is on the way!
Cocktails at 5

DAILY QUOTA:

"Drinking Destroys Dreams"
- Sign at a Connecticut high school health fair

"You're never too old to do goofy stuff."
- Ward Cleaver

QUIPPING POST:

Safari
A drunk had just returned from being on safari in Africa with his drinking buddy. He was talking the bartender's ear off and showing holiday photos. "Here we are sitting on a real live elephant! We thought it had to be a baby elephant because notice how small the trunk is! Our guide assured us it was a full-grown adult, but even he thought the whole thing was so hilarious he could barely stop laughing long enough to snap the picture. Have you ever seen an elephant with such a small trunk?" The bartender took one look at the photo and said: "What in the world? The guide wasn't laughing at the elephant, he was laughing at you! Look at the picture, you guys were mounted on it backward -- that's the tail."

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New links added today

Pause, reflect/think and refresh yourself: Alcoholism Recovery Station

Inspirational stories and resources: New Beginnings

Live the clean lifestyle: On the Wagon

Online recovery community: Sober City

DAILY QUOTA:

"You know, in America we don't call that breakfast, we call that alcoholism."
- From the TV series, 'The Stones'

"Everything ends this way in France -- everything. Weddings, christenings, duels, funerals, swindlings, diplomatic affairs -- everything is a pretext for a good dinner."
- Jean Anouilh

QUIPPING POST:

French tourist
A French tourist in London was getting along pretty well speaking English. It was only a problem whenever he drank a bit too much wine and his French accent would thicken. Back at the five-star hotel after a night out on the town, he telephoned room service, "Some pepper please, quickly." The clerk on the phone asked, "Would you prefer black pepper or white pepper?" The Frenchman snapped back: "You fool, toilet pepper."

DAILY QUOTA:

"The more I want to get something done, the less I call it work."
- Richard Bach

"I work until beer o'clock."
- Stephen King

QUIPPING POST:

Rent in arrears
A woman answered a knock at her door. A man she didn't know was standing there, "Pardon me, but I'm wondering if you would consider helping someone who is in need. Actually, it's the fellow who lives in the house next door to you. It seems the chap has fallen into an alcoholic tailspin. Because of his drinking, he's been unable to hold down a job. Now his rent is seriously in arrears and he's in danger of being evicted. Would you be willing to help with a donation?" The woman wasn't sure, "Maybe, but who are you?" The stranger replied: "I'm his landlord."

DAILY QUOTA:

"Maybe I'm lucky to be going so slowly, because I may be going in the wrong direction."
- Ashleigh Brilliant

"One day recently a man called out to me from the other side of the street asking me for the price of a drink. I beckoned him to come over for it and he waved me away. This has to be the Everest of laziness."
- Jeffery Bernard

QUIPPING POST:

Seals
Q: What's the difference between an AA group and a 'Save the Seals' campaign?
A: One has a primary purpose, the other has a primary porpoise.